Hey Civilian,

I spent time this week filming in a parking garage. Not because it made for a dramatic backdrop, but because parking lots and garages are genuinely one of the highest-risk environments most people move through every single day without thinking about it once.

This week's Brief is built entirely around that environment. What makes it dangerous, what actually makes it safer, and a few habits that cost nothing to build and pay off the one time they matter.

Let's get into it.

A transitional space is anywhere you're moving between two places you already consider safe. Your house to your car. The store to your car. The elevator to the parking level. Those few seconds where your brain has already checked out because you feel like you've arrived, even though you're still fully exposed.

That's exactly why parking lots, stairwells, and garages get picked over. People go on autopilot there. Phone out, arms full, keys buried at the bottom of a bag. The threat doesn't find a distracted person. The distracted person walks right into the threat.

Anytime I feel the urge to pull my phone out in a parking lot, even for a legitimate reason, I tell myself no, and wait until I'm inside or at my destination. That's the whole shift in one habit. Stop treating the space between safe and safe as neutral. It isn't.

None of these are dramatic. All of them compound over time into a pattern of behavior that looks ordinary from the outside and makes you genuinely harder to target.

Pull through or back in. Backing out of a spot means your back is to the lot, you're slower, and your blind spots are worse right when you'd want them better. I'm guilty of pulling in nose-first because it's easier. But I also know that if I can't leave quickly, I'm more at risk. On a job, when a vehicle is a secondary extraction option for a principal I'm protecting, backing in isn't a preference. It's non-negotiable. Apply that same logic to yourself.

Minimize time at the door. Every time I get in or out of my car I think about that specific funnel and spend the least amount of time possible there. Standing next to your open car door, you're boxed in by the door, the car next to you, and whatever you're carrying. You can't move back fast. You can't see behind you. Decide before you get there whether you're getting in or getting something out, and move through it deliberately.

Pause before you enter. A parking garage is confined, with limited exits and limited options. Before you walk in, stop at the entrance and scan. Don't commit to the space until you've looked into it. This costs you about three seconds and gives you information that would otherwise cost you much more.

Drop the keys-between-fingers habit. It's the most repeated parking lot safety tip out there and also the one I'd tell you to drop. Thin metal keys don't have the structure to deliver real force. Most of the time you're more likely to cut your own hand than stop anyone. Distance and exit beat improvised weapons every time. Awareness earlier means you rarely get close enough to need any of this.

The goal was never to win a fight in a parking lot. It's to never be in one.

There's a trend right now called car rotting: just sitting in your parked car for a while before going inside. It's not the problem. Sitting in a lot for twenty minutes, phone out, music on, eyes closed, is the problem.

Everything that makes the car door dangerous for a few seconds gets worse when you stretch it out to half an episode of something. You're stationary, predictable, and checked out. The longer you stay, the more opportunity you give to someone who may view you as a target. Both duration and distraction compound the risk. They multiply each other.

The fix isn't "stop doing it." Lock your doors the second you're in, every time, no exceptions. Pick a lit spot with foot traffic, not the empty back row. Keep one ear open. Glance up every few minutes. If it's somewhere unfamiliar or it's late, save the decompression time for your own driveway.

Same framework applies if you think someone is following you in your car. First, verify. Don't assume. Most of the time it's coincidence. But if I'm heading somewhere I don't want people tracking, I alter my route. Then I escalate to something deliberate: pull into a parking lot, drive in a circle, exit a different way, change direction entirely. If they stay with you through that, you have confirmation. At that point your job is not to confront. It's to call the police, give the dispatcher a description, your location, and your direction of travel, and let them handle it. The goal is never to be right about being followed. The goal is to get home.

Plain colors, no logos, nothing tactical. Buy the right neutral jacket and you disappear into a crowd. That's how it gets marketed. That's not what actually makes someone forgettable.

Behavior is what makes someone forgettable. The person who stands out is the one scanning too hard, moving too deliberately, checking exits like it's a performance. You can wear the most boring jacket in the store and still read as someone playing a part.

Real gray man is calm, ordinary movement. Not looking invisible. Being unremarkable because nothing about how you carry yourself asks for attention. A game I play in public is moving through spaces without being noticed. Stores, malls, parking lots, parks. If someone looks at me with more than a passing glance, it's a fail. Hard mode is no one ever looking twice.

Capable is not a costume. It's not even a color palette. It's how you actually move through a room.

Most people picture danger as a dark alley at midnight. The reality is a parking lot at 2pm on a Tuesday, while they're checking a notification and digging for their keys with a bag on each arm.

This week: the next time you walk to your car, leave the phone in your pocket until you're inside with the door shut. One habit. Every time. That's where this starts.

What's your number one personal safety concern right now? Hit reply and tell me. I read every one.

Share the Brief: If this was useful, forward it to one person who should be reading it. That's how we grow this — one capable civilian at a time.

Stay capable.
Colin Lepiscopo
Founder, Model Civilian
10% of all Model Civilian proceeds go to We Get Water 💧